My friend just had a baby, which seems crazy because we’re not even in our mid thirties. But the heart wants what it wants, and she has always wanted to be a mother. I finally was able to go over and visit and see her new bub and that visit was really enlightening.
First off she walked me through her delivery and birth experience. You know I wanted to know because I’m considering having kids one day and I know that storks just don’t drop them off from the sky. And you know what? After hearing her story, I may not want kiddos anytime soon. It began with her going past her due date and it ended with an urgent c section.
I guess it’s common for first time babies to go past their due date, but my friend has a scary late-night visit to the hospital when she couldn’t feel her baby move around like normal. Apparently tracking your baby’s movements while it’s still inside of you is a thing? I have no idea. She was saying that her son would typically move a bunch at night, but one night he wasn’t moving at all. They ended up in triage and with a ultrasound checking on him.
He was alright, but that experience set off a cascade of medical interventions, none of which she wanted.
But now her son is here, and he is so precious. Just this tiny nugget of cheeks and thighs. My friend? She’s still reeling from a traumatic birth and the struggles of trying to breastfeed. We were talking and she mentioned that she had a doula, you can find her here. Afterwards I was putzing around her blog and learned so many things. Like what to do in early labour, or pelvic floor physio. The more I learn about childbirth the less I want a kiddo.
My fried was telling me about her c section scar aching and her boobs aching. When I visited her, she was still bleeding and was moving around a bit slowly. Thankfully her partner took some time off, but I had no idea the magnitude of creating a baby and then evicting that baby from your body. She keeps talking about ‘bouncing back’ and I’m like girl… just take a second. You need to give yourself some time.
But the beauty of it all? It was the new life that was created, it was the new relationship, a new mother that was born too. After feeding, her baby passed out apparently ‘milk drunk’. And she just took him and laid him on her chest the two of them just chilled. It was a holy moment really, something that I won’t quickly forget.
